Tiara’less: with a pageant girl’s soul, im still trying to work my way around a hair curler while using a bottle of bronzer

Sometimes when I watch Toddlers and Tiaras on TV I wonder what it would’ve been like to be in those competitions. I know I did jazz, tap and ballet when I was younger, but why did I stop? More importantly why did my mom let me stop? Suddenly my mom let me dress like a tomboy and I didn’t have to brush my hair. I wore Vans, skateboarded and listened to K-Rock. Why wasn’t my mom more of a stage mom?

Circa 4th grade

The closest moment I had to my mom being a stage mom is when she got me booked on Little Nicky (the worst movie ever) when I was 13.

we like to smirk

But I wish I could have done pageants. I can be very competitive and manipulative. Could it’ve been that there weren’t many pageants around where I grew up? I grew up in a suburb of Westchester, NY, which is about 45 minutes north of New York City. I didn’t grow up in Central Florida or Mississipi, where girls like this were flourishing:

I tried to live out my fantasy to dress as a Little Miss Pageant girl this year during Halloween, but was mistaken for Wonder Woman 😦

On the right, I'm in costume in my Swimwear Portion of a Pageant.

I’m fascinated with these little Jon Bonet Ramsey types mainly because of their parents blatant and apparent ways of vicariously living through their children for either financial or emotional reasons. I also like to see the competitiveness and determination from three years olds to win something as ridiculous as a “title,” trophy, and $50 to the local Pizza Restaurant. But hey, I guess if you lived in the middle of nowhere Nebraska, I’d want to be princess of the town hall stage too.

Some of these moms are just crazy though..

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1 Response to Tiara’less: with a pageant girl’s soul, im still trying to work my way around a hair curler while using a bottle of bronzer

  1. Molly Lewensky says:

    these are cutest girls ever i just wanna cry when i think about them i just want to be beautiful like them why is this happening my turtle ran away last week i just dont know what to do i just cant take it anymore iwant him back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =-(

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