With summer coming up, I suppose for some guys the question arises of what type of board shorts to get. Let me just tell you right now, you will have a terrible and embarrassing summer, filled with no ass, if you own Hibiscus board shorts. I loathe hibiscus board shorts. When I say hibiscus board shorts, it’s not any particular brand, because a lot of companies make them; but it’s the print that drives me crazy as well as the particular cheap fabric which is usually associated with a Hibiscus board short. It just reminds me of econimical Aloha wear that they sell to tourists that makes me not want to enjoy a lovely day at the beach. When I lived in Hawaii for three years, I saw a lot of tourists everyday, and those that had hibiscus board shorts were certainly not a sight for sore eyes and ruined my backdrop of Waikiki and Diamond Head on a daily basis.
The type of guy who wears hibiscus board shorts is also the type to wear those silver mirrored cycling sunglasses from Mobil Mart/any other gas station or a mountain biking store. I’m not sure if I hate that type of sunglasses or board shorts more, but they certainly go hand-in-hand for many confused men out there, and this needs to end. This bad combination is something out of a guy’s life from San Diego who loves to wake up early in the morning and go for a sunrise bike ride with his silver sunglasses and tight spandex, and then goes for a dip in the hotel pool in his hibiscus shorts. Well, I’ve certainly had enough of these two items, and I hope you’re smart enough to realize the disturbing congruence in them, too.
Please do the right thing and say no to hibiscus board shorts and cycling glasses.